You might be the type of person who has multiple friend groups or maybe you’re someone who just has a small number of people you call friends. Everyone views and defines friendship differently, but here’s how I think of it:
Your real friends should be people you trust, who will support you, respect you, and people you respect, support, and trusts you back.
I’ve always been a strong believer in having quality over quantity friendship, but I also understand the appeal in having a large pool of “friends” since you’ll always have something to do, someone to talk to, someone to hang out with, but are these type of “friends” worth it?
If I invest in my friends and build those relationship, won’t it be worth it?
I’m not saying don’t do this. In fact, I highly recommend that you invest in other people’s lives; be selfless, get to know them, listen to them. You never know what these relationships will turn into and the impact you’ll have in each other’s lives. But just because you invest, this doesn’t necessarily mean these people will automatically become your best friends, and that’s okay. I applaud you for putting yourself out there and trying to build a relationship, but if it leads to nothing, then that’s okay too.
You learn something new from everyone.
Don’t judge someone in the first ten minutes, take time to get to know them and give them a chance. Wouldn’t you want this treatment back too? Everyone has their own story to tell, everyone has their own unique personality. By interacting with new people, listening to their stories, and getting to know them, I believe this is never a waste of time. You’ll learn something new, they’ll bring out a new side of you and vise versa.
It’s okay to only have a small handful of people you call best friend.
Let’s be real, time is limited, so of course we want to use it wisely. This crazy thing we call life is stressful and you’ll constantly have battles to fight, but these fights aren’t too bad when you have a good - healthy support system. Whether that’s a family member or a friend, even if you only have one person, it’ll make all the difference. In fact, your best friend(s) should be the easiest part of life, as told by one of my best friends.
It’s okay to let go of certain people.
I know this might be terrifying, especially if this is someone you depend on, but if a certain person is starting to get toxic in your life, you feel like they’re not meeting you halfway, or they’re taking advantage of you -- are they really worth it? If you’ve already confronted them and tried to resolve the issue multiple times but you come back to the same conclusion, is the friendship/relationship worth it? I understand how difficult this can be, letting go of people is something I struggle with, but as scary as it is, sometimes, it can be the best thing for you. Be free, let them go, and you'll start to find yourself again.
You win some. You lose some. It's a never ending cycle of meeting new people and building relationships.
Some will stick around, some will fall under the "network" bucket, and some will completely disappear from your life. If some people are bound to leave, then what's the point in investing in them? Scroll up and reread this post from the start.
You'll meet people you'll grow with and people who'll make you grow; people who'll fight with you and people who'll make you fight; people who'll help build your home and people who'll leave you alone.
It's during these times when the people who'll make you grow, make you fight, and leave you alone, that the people who'll grow with you, fight with you, and build a home with you will shine ever so brightly in your life and the people you'll want to keep.